


Superlatives

by PeppyBismilk



Series: Seungchuchu Week Stories [5]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Family, Fluff, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Romance, Seungchuchu Week 2020, Social Media, Weirdly Specific AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:06:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22637254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeppyBismilk/pseuds/PeppyBismilk
Summary: Phichit and Seung-gil visit Seung-gil's parents, which means Phichit finally gets what he wants: access to all of Seung-gil's baby pictures.Part ofThe Finer Points of Technical SalesAU and written for Seungchuchu Week 2020, Day 7: Family/AU.
Relationships: Phichit Chulanont/Lee Seung Gil
Series: Seungchuchu Week Stories [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1623043
Comments: 16
Kudos: 59
Collections: Seungchuchu Week 2020





	Superlatives

Going back to his hometown for a baby’s birthday party was bad.

Staying with his parents was worse.

But once Phichit found his old computer, it was all over.

“Do you think it still works?” Phichit swiped some dust off the space bar with his index finger. “Can we start it up?” 

“No.”

“Why not?” A grin bloomed on Phichit’s face. “Do you have dirty pictures saved on here?” 

Seung-gil did. But he didn’t care about those.

“Wait.” If Phichit was excited before, he was practically salivating now. “Are there old pictures of  _ you _ on this computer? Oh my god, I need to see them. Please? You’ve seen all my embarrassing high school photos, so you pretty much have to show me yours!”

He had a point (not that any of Phichit’s pictures were actually embarrassing). His so-called “cringey scene phase” just meant his gorgeous face had been adorned with skillfully-applied makeup, a nose piercing (which had closed up, much to Seung-gil’s dismay), and a litany of “regrettable hair colors.” Seung-gil had completely missed the trend; all he knew was Phichit looked cute with rainbow hair in his eyes.

“Your mom probably has all kinds of pictures,” Phichit was saying. Seung-gil’s back went rigid. “Should I go ask her?”

That had him booting up the old PC in no time. When the ancient operating system finally loaded, he could have kissed the monitor. His mother had already asked when he and Phichit were getting married three times, and made one not-so-subtle insinuation that it wasn’t too soon for them to start a family.

“Bada, Momo, and Cola are our family,” Phichit had said. And just when Seung-gil thought he couldn’t love Phichit more than he already did, Phichit had busted out his phone.

After the third hamster picture, Seung-gil’s mother had left the room, grumbling about how she wasn’t getting any younger. 

The least Seung-gil could do was show Phichit the picture.

Just like he remembered, the computer was packed with old games and some high school assignments, but Seung-gil navigated to the folder labelled  _ Photos.  _ He clicked it.

“One picture?!” Phichit grabbed Seung-gil’s arm. “You can’t be serious.” 

But it wasn’t just the only photo in the directory. It was the only photo of himself on the computer. “Guess it should have just said  _ Photo.” _

Phichit pushed him out of the way to grab the mouse. “How dare you joke at a time like this!?” He opened the picture and let out a gasp, then slumped into the desk chair with a low moan. “Oh my god.”

Seung-gil wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad reaction. His aunt had taken this particular photo, of him sitting by himself at a family barbecue. His younger self glared at the camera for coming between him and his thinly sliced, barely seared beef. He’d only kept the picture because that had been particularly good beef.

Back then, he never would have imagined having a boyfriend like Phichit, but his taste in food hadn’t changed. 

“Oh my god,” Phichit said again, laying his head flat on Seung-gil’s desk. “You were totally my type.”

Seung-gil frowned. “As opposed to now?”

“Obviously,” droned Phichit. Seung-gil had a feeling he was being impersonated, but then Phichit let out a dreamy sigh. “Look at your hair!”

It hung in his eyes in the picture, so long the ends curled. “I hated haircuts,” Seung-gil explained. That was still true. Too much touching. 

“Those boots! And that outfit? You were goth without even trying.” All of Phichit’s gushing was making Seung-gil’s cheeks hot. “That’s so fucking cool.”

The only source of variety in Seung-gil’s high school wardrobe was the washing machine—everything had been a different level of faded black. Phichit was probably exaggerating. “No one thought I was cool back in high school.”

“I did! I didn’t know you, but high school Phichit would have thought you were cool!” Phichit wrapped his arms around him and added, “High school Phichit definitely would have asked to feel you up in the backseat of his 2002 Ford Taurus.”

“Which base is that?” Seung-gil asked, thinking back to his deliberately celibate teenage years. 

“Like...first?” Phichit scrunched up his nose in thought. “Depends where my hands are. Are we role-playing this? Because I will absolutely be your teenage dream tonight.”

Seung-gil’s lip curled in disgust.

“It’s a song!” Phichit insisted. He patted Seung-gil’s arm and turned back to the laptop. “I love you. More pictures, please.”

“That’s it.”

“You took one picture in four years?” Phichit kept opening and closing his mouth like it just didn’t compute. 

Seung-gil hated to see him so distraught. That was the only explanation for the words that came out of his mouth next.

“How about pictures from college?”

All it took was a smile and Seung-gil was pulling out his laptop and navigating to Sara Crispino’s Facebook page. He didn’t have a Facebook, but Sara’s pictures were all public.

“Wait! I’ve met her! Her girlfriend works for Microtech.” Phichit wrestled the laptop out of his hands and started logging in before Seung-gil could stop him. “I didn’t know she went to school with you! Does this mean I’ve been sitting on a gold mine this whole time?! Why didn’t I look at her albums back then?”

_ Because you were too busy grinding up on Christophe Giacometti? _

Seung-gil didn’t voice that thought because he was trying to keep his jealousy in check. Besides, Phichit swore up and down that he was the happiest he’d ever been.

It didn’t hurt that Phichit also said he was having the best sex of his life (and getting better every time).

_ So there, _ Seung-gil thought.

“Seung-gil…” Phichit shook his head in mock disappointment as he picked an album. “You told me you didn’t have any friends in college, but these pictures say otherwise.”

Seung-gil shrugged. “We knew each other.”

“I bet you were the most popular kid in your high school, too. Did they vote you anything?” Phichit, of course, had been voted Most Popular and Most Likely to Become Internet Famous. Seung-gil had seen his yearbooks, so he supposed it was only fair to come clean.

“Quietest,” he said. His upper lip curled. “And Best Hair."

“I knew it!” Phichit went back to admiring pictures, and with a sigh, he said, “I worship at the church of Sara Crispino.”

“She’s annoying.”

“All your faves are.” Phichit planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek and whipped out his own phone.

Phichit went through and liked every single picture with Seung-gil in it. He alternated between hearts and gasping emojis, making little noises and adding spoken and typed comments as he browsed. 

“Wait, isn’t that her brother?” Phichit asked, pointing at Michele. This particular picture was from an International Festival the twins had dragged Seung-gil to under the promise of free food, and Michele was feeding Sara off of his chopsticks.

“Twin brother.” 

Yuck,” said Phichit. “I’m adding him, too. Oh, look! Sara sent me a message!” 

Seung-gil crouched down at Phichit’s side to see his phone. 

_ Phichit!!!! I remember you from the club after Mila’s expo this summer! You’re Seung-gil’s boyfriend now!!!! I’m so excited for you both! I can tell you make him really happy <3 _

How could she tell? Seung-gil had only posted two pictures of them together on his Instagram.

Then again, every other picture was of his dog.

Phichit was already typing a reply.

_ not as happy as he makes me!!!! _ _  
_ _ THANK YOU FOR DOCUMENTING HIS LIFE _ _  
_ _ if u ever need a kidney i gotchu _

That seemed excessive. But Sara was just as enthusiastic as Phichit.

_ He deserves a sweetheart like you. We have to meet up sometime!! I haven’t seen Seung-gil since college! _

Phichit was vibrating, primed to explode.

_ name the time and place! _ _  
_ _ i’ll kidnap him if i have to _

“You’re weird.”

Phichit grinned. “You love it.”

He did.

_ OK!!!! I’ll bring Mila and Mickey! Can you get Seung-gil to join Facebook too? Or respond to my texts? Hahaha _

“No.”

_ it’s a miracle he even responds to mine tbh _ _  
_ _ but i will get your number from him! _

“I deleted it.”

Phichit glanced over his shoulder and stuck his tongue out. “Like you don’t have it memorized. I know you can’t delete it from your brain.”

_ Tell him I’m sooo happy for him. Mickey and I miss him and deep down I know he misses us too. _

“I don’t.”

_ he does!!! _ _  
_ _ hes the softest boyfriend ever _

“Stop.” Seung-gil stood up.

Phichit spun around in the desk chair and poked his stomach. “It’s true!”

“Only soft for you.”

Phichit started to say “Aww,” then narrowed his eyes. “Hey, wait a second…”

“You know what I meant.”

But Phichit’s eyes were burning now. “Come here and we’ll see who’s soft,” he said, pulling Seung-gil down into the chair with him.

Seung-gil would have dug up every single photo of himself he could find to make his boyfriend happy, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t prefer more physical ways of connecting.

His younger self never dreamed this chair (let alone this room) would see this kind of action: tongue kissing, heavy petting, grinding so hard that the chair almost fell over…

Phichit pulled back, eyes dark and voice rough. Breathless, he says, “I wanna bang you in your twin bed so bad right now.”

“Weird.” But as soon as the word left his mouth, Seung-gil was kissing him and wheeling the chair toward the bed. It caught on something—the rug—and his stomach flipped as they tipped over. Phichit tried to correct them, but so did Seung-gil, and that sealed their fate. They both cried out as the chair toppled to the ground with them in it. Seung-gil rolled away to try to save Phichit from the impact, but his funny bone connected with the desk and he yelped again.

“Not the kind of banging I had in mind,” Phichit groaned.

The pain in Seung-gil’s arm was nothing compared to his horror when the door flew open to reveal his mother. She looked taller from this angle. 

“What on earth are you doing?” she demanded.

What would his mom have done if she had walked in on them? Seung-gil was glad they hadn’t gotten past kissing. “We fell down,” he muttered.

His mother shook her head, like she didn’t believe them. “Come downstairs. Dinner’s almost ready.” But to Seung-gil’s surprise, she didn’t have any snide remarks about their position. 

Phichit sprang to his feet like falling on the floor was a calculated move. “I thought something smelled good!”

His mother smiled, and it wasn’t one of those pinched smiles she always gave Seung-gil. This was a genuine smile, the same kind she reserved for Seung-gil’s baby cousins. “Does it?” Her voice sounded different when she talked to Phichit, too. “I’m making hot pot. I hope you like it.” 

“It’s one of my favorites,” Phichit replied with a bow. Why was he so good with parents? He sounded just as eager and honest as ever, too, so Seung-gil didn’t think he was faking it (although the moment his mother turned around, Phichit blew Seung-gil a kiss, pointed at the bed, and mimicked thrusting his hips). 

At least Seung-gil had something to look forward to later. Being quiet was never a problem for him (provided he didn’t fall off of any more furniture).

But Phichit hurried to catch up with Seung-gil’s mom. “Is there anything I can help with for dinner?”

His mother grinned. Seung-gil winced automatically. It looked so unnatural. “No, my husband has it under control. But since you like pictures so much, I wanted to show you some of Seung-gil’s baby pictures.” 

Phichit’s eyes went as wide as saucers. “Yes, please!”

He was falling into a trap. She was probably going to tell him about how cute babies were in the hopes of goading him into adopting one. 

The sooner this weekend was over, the better. Seung-gil was about to protest when his mother turned around and glared at him. 

“You can help your father,” she snapped. “And don’t throw the cabbage away this time.”

“But it’s garbage.” 

“Are you trying to die at thirty-five?” His mother said it at the same time as Phichit pouted at him, and Seung-gil rolled his eyes and headed for the kitchen.

He and his father cooked in total silence. At least one of his parents understood him. 

Seung-gil didn’t throw the cabbage away, but he didn’t put in as much as the recipe called for either, though. 

Voices carried into the kitchen and Seung-gil cringed every time. 

“And this is Seung-gil’s fifth grade picture.”

“Look at his cheeks! I want to pinch them!”

“Believe me, it was hard to resist,” his mother said. “And here he is when he got his braces.”

For once, she didn’t follow that with a tirade about the outrageous cost of orthodontia. 

“He looks so cute! And here I thought his gorgeous smile was purely hereditary.” 

Phichit was really laying it on thick. Any minute now, his mother was going to say “What smile?” or something equally mean. 

“He does have a lovely smile, doesn’t he?”

Was he hearing things? Seung-gil turned to his dad for confirmation, but he was washing a knife, unperturbed. 

Maybe his mother thought he couldn’t hear her.

But she was nice to Seung-gil all through dinner, too. She must have really wanted Phichit to like her. It was a scary thought.

He kept waiting for more marriage pressure. More guilt tripping about children. But it never came.

Finally, when his parents retired to bed, Seung-gil’s mother beckoned him to the stairs with a finger. It was almost a relief.

He prepared himself for the verbal onslaught. What would it be? How he shouldn’t sleep in the same room with Phichit before marriage? How the party tomorrow had better inject him with baby fever or else? 

“I’m not going to make you sleep in separate rooms,” his mother grumbled. “I’m not as cruel or as stupid as you think I am.”

Seung-gil could think of a lot of words to describe his mother, but  _ stupid _ wasn’t one of them. 

“Just take care of Phichit. That’s all I wanted to say.”

The words almost didn’t register. Seung-gil stared at his mother, totally blank.

“Don’t shut him out or push him away like you do everyone else. You’ll never forgive yourself if you take him for granted. Take care of him and let him take care of you.”

She spoke just as sternly as she always did with him, but there was something sad in her voice, too.

“Okay.”

That was all Seung-gil could manage.

And just like that, the far-off look in her eyes sharpened, and she pointed a finger at him. “We’re leaving at 9 o’clock. Don’t sleep in.”

Seung-gil was still reeling when he made his way back to Phichit. 

“Everything okay?” Phichit asked, taking his hand now that they were free from watchful eyes. 

“Yeah.” Seung-gil blinked. “She’s being too nice. It’s weird.”

Phichit broke into a grin. “You know I have that effect on people. I even got your dad to smile at dinner.” 

He had. Phichit was magical. Seung-gil stared at his boyfriend in a daze, his mother’s warning echoing in his head. Phichit deserved to be treasured. Cherished. Appreciated.

Seung-gil hated when his mother was right. Then again, she hadn’t specified how he should take care of Phichit.

If Seung-gil had to follow her advice, he was going to do it his way.

He tugged on Phichit’s hand. “Come on. Let’s go break my old bed frame.”

That put an even bigger grin on Phichit’s face than Seung-gil’s awkward preteen photos. 

“Challenge accepted!”

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually hanging out in my drafts, but it needed a lot of rework to shape it up for Seungchuchu Week. Also, staying true to my brand by referencing vaguely popular [SNL sketches](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-QG-rFf4po).


End file.
